html Neon Nightmare: Custom Prophets

Custom Prophets

Where do you get your prophecies? Do you have the best, most accurate, and most entertaining ones in town? We do! Our team of expert, totally-not-actually-experts has curated a selection of the most outlandish, most absurd, and most utterly useless prophecies you can imagine. Learn More: Prophetic Prospects

Prophet 1: The Chicken Will Rule the World Prophet 2: The Answer to All Life's Greatest Mysteries Prophet 3: The Future of Pizza Toppings Prophet 4: The Infallible Guide to Extreme Croquet Prophet 5: The One and Only Solution to All Your Socks